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Writer's pictureSileta Bell

Rebuilding Emotional Intimacy in High-Conflict Relationships

Updated: Aug 8, 2023


Let’s face it – conflict and relationships go hand in hand. They are deeply intertwined; so much so that they form an inevitable part of human connection. When couples are able to resolve their conflicts, they open doors to growth, understanding, and even a deeper connection in their relationship. Researchers have gone as far as linking conflict resolution to long-term health. When conflict is not managed carefully, however, emotional intimacy often becomes strained or lost. Rebuilding this vital connection requires courage, vulnerability, and a commitment to growth. It is a process that takes time, patience, and commitment from both partners. It involves letting go of resentments, learning from past mistakes, and embracing vulnerability as a means of connection. But this is all easier said than done, isn’t it?


Reconnecting through vulnerability is not a simple feat, particularly in high-conflict relationships. It requires individuals to peel back layers of self-protection, allowing their true selves to be seen and understood by their partner. It takes immense courage to reveal our deepest fears, insecurities, and past wounds, especially when trust has been broken. However, it is within this vulnerability that the seeds of emotional intimacy can be planted and nurtured.


Emotional Intimacy

"It takes immense courage to reveal our deepest fears, insecurities, and past wounds, especially when trust has been broken."



Along with reconnecting through vulnerability, relationship experts would likely agree that establishing trust plays a central role in the process of rebuilding emotional intimacy. Trusting a partner again, or perhaps for the first time, after experiencing high conflict can feel like an uphill battle. It requires individuals to confront their fears, take risks, and believe in the possibility of healing. Working with a skilled marriage and family therapist can be invaluable during this journey, as they are trained to provide guidance, support, and a safe space to explore and address trust issues. Through therapeutic interventions, couples can learn to rebuild trust slowly, step by step, and foster an environment of emotional safety where vulnerability can flourish.


Ultimately, the road to rebuilding emotional intimacy in high-conflict relationships is filled with ups and downs. It demands patience, empathy, and a commitment to growth from both partners. It requires active listening, open communication, and a willingness to validate each other's emotions and experiences. Remember, you and your partner do not have to embark on this journey towards emotional intimacy alone. Seeking professional help from a therapist specializing in couples therapy can provide invaluable support and guidance as you and your partner take the high road towards a deeper, more fulfilling relationship filled with love, understanding, and genuine intimacy.





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